Tag Archives: Trust

Here’s what I’ve been dealing with this month. In the face of very real fear – the kind of fear a mother faces when an incidental finding on a CT scan suddenly becomes an incident in the life of her four-year-old child – I have had to examine how deeply I really trust my Heavenly Father. I praise Him when I see His provisions. I worship when I receive His wisdom. But do I trust Him, “Though [He] slay me”? When God, in His wisdom, lets me go far into the unknown to strengthen my faith, do I submit and willingly hand over my fears? I’m workin’ on it.

Nancy Missler writes, in Private Worship, the steps she believes we must take to truly enter “the beauty of His holiness.”

1 | Recognize     2 | Repent

3 | Release         4 | Read

So here I am saying, “I am not the master of my fate.” Or my son’s. Or anyone’s fate, for that matter. I cannot and will not find what I need within myself or the world. I. Need. God.

So while I may be troubled // perplexed // persecuted // or cast down, I am not distressed // in despair // abandoned // nor destroyed.

I choose to believe that God is for me. He will make a way.

Think, Act, Sow Generously

It’s tempting in times of want to hoard. I know I’m tempted. I don’t relish sharing the last bite of my meal. I’ve thought about that bite. I’ve mentally prepared myself: “This is the last bite.” I’ve worked my way toward it, and I anticipate it with satisfaction. If I’m asked to share it, I panic.

January for me, and 200 million other Americans, means a new budget. In our home, we don’t have CDs or annual interest payments that float us through the year, so we have to be thoughtful in our spending. We’ve made life choices that allow us time together as a family – SOW – but those choices come with a price – REAP. And that price has a name: BUDGET. In a budget, every dollar feels like that last bite.

It’s easy to look at our electronic envelopes (care of our newest free app EEBA) and wonder at the proportionality of our spending/saving/giving. It doesn’t add up. It really doesn’t, but I have to trust God on this one. In our home, giving is valued, even when I don’t know how it’s going to add up for my own family in the end. One thing I do know is that it always works. We live in a beautiful home with two healthy kids. We drive two reliable cars to two jobs that allow us to use our talents doing what we love. It adds up, for certain!

And because it adds up – even when my calculator says it shouldn’t – I decide again in 2012, I will sow generously with my finances.

And as my daughter reminded me tonight with a “Mom, you need to cuddle us longer,” money isn’t all I have to give.